There’s s difference between being loyal and allowing people to take advantage of your goodness, kindness, your heart, YOU! 

I feel like as women we are naturally loyal. However In my years of living I realized that sometimes I was being “ loyal “ to people who didn’t deserve it. I feel as though sometimes we stay in these friendships/relationships because we may feel like we owe someone something. Well I’m here to tell you “ YOU DONT OWE ANYONE ANYTHING PERIOD!”. When I was younger I had friendships/relationships that I felt wasn’t right for me but there was things that kept me there. Whether it was because this person may have looked out for me at one point when I needed something or someone or just because I knew them since we was five and it’s like oh we’re supposed to stay friends and do that whole “ I knew you since we were toddlers” thing. As I grew older I realized I don’t owe these people anything. If someone looked out for me when I needed it they should have done it because they felt in their heart to do so. I don’t owe it to anyone to stick around when I feel like I’m not being treated right or if I outgrew them simply because of that one time my car broke down and they saved the day. I don’t want this message to be confused though. If you have friends who treat you right then yeah sure it’s no problem with looking out for them as well but make sure it’s a healthy mutual relationship and not one where someone or yourself is holding things over your head.

I’ve never had the problem where I felt like I owed guys sex because they’ve done something for me but I see things on tv and even through conversation with friends and peers I know this is how some women feel. Again I’m going to say “ YOU DONT OWE ANYONE ANYTHING “ If a guy ask you on a date and pays for your meal that’s what the hell he’s supposed to do. Why would you think dinner and drinks equal your vagina ? It doesn’t. Now hey if that’s what you want to do because you WANT TO then that’s fine but not because you feel obligated. 

Family, Family, Family. When we talk about family its definitely this feeling of “ oh but they’re family so I have to ..NOPE let me tell you all this will do is stress you out trying to be there for everything and everyone. Do what you can but don’t stress yourself when you cant. Growing up I felt like I owed it to my family to do things they asked of me. It might have been small but most of the time it was big and requiring me to go out my way but who says no to family? This girl lol. Again I’m not saying don’t ever do for your family I’m saying , do what you can if you want to. Don’t allow people to guilt trip you cause I was victim of that. Even with family let go of them relationships if it is causing you more harm than good ! You don’t owe them anything either. 

The only person you owe something to is YOURSELF. You owe it to yourself to be happy, to enjoy life, to genuinely love. You owe it yourself to eliminate people causing you stress and keeping those close who bring you joy. Cause at the end of the day “ YOU DONT OWE ANYONE ANYTHING “